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The Capsule:
Sometime in the early 21 century, Scotland is plagued by the
Reaper Virus (note to scientists, don’t let heavy metal bands name your
virus). In order to contain the
infection, the British government walls off the entire country. When the Reaper Virus resurfaces in London 30-odd years later,
the government sends an elite military team into the wasteland in search of Dr.
Kane (Malcolm McDowell), who was working on a cure. Led by badass Major Sinclair (Rhona Mitra), the team must battle hordes of cannibal
punks and medieval knights (!) through decaying cities, open roadways, and
tourist attractions of post-apocalyptic Scotland. Even if they manage to find a cure and get
out, they will have to deal with Canaris (David O'Hara), a nefarious politician
who may not have the public’s best interest at heart.
DOOMSDAY is another case of the advantage of going in with
super low expectations. I heard this
movie was terrible, even from a person who’s taste is remarkably close to mine
(yes, those people do exist). But I
enjoyed director Neil Marshall’s other work, DOG SOLDIERS and especially THE
DESCENT, so I figured as long as it wasn’t a bunch of people leaning in the
corner pissing themselves for two hours, I would get something out of it. I am happy to say it is not two hours of
people pissing themselves. It has some
serious problems, but despite everything, I kind of dug it. 
This movie can make no claims at originality. It’s filled with such blatant lifts that it
can’t even be called homage with a serious face. Obviously, I have no problem with rip-offs
(see GRIZZLY, THE CAR, HUMANOIDS FROM THE DEEP), even unofficial remakes like LOCKOUT. The interesting thing with DOOMSDAY is that it doesn’t just rip-off one film, it rips-off a half dozen of them and blends them together into an oddball smoothie. DOOMSDAY is clearly a take on ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK and ROAD WARRIOR, but it also has elements of GHOST IN THE SHELL (the anime), ALIENS, 28 DAYS LATER, and most bizarrely, EXCALIBUR.
It is amusing how brazen Marshall is about his cinematic
larceny. He’s kind of playfully
smirking about it. A Carpenter-esque
electronic theme plays when Sinclair is being briefed about sneaking into and
escaping from the Scottish surrogate for New York.
Two minor characters are named Carpenter and Miller. The open roads are filled with MAD MAX cast
offs, even though there is no real reason for it. The scene where Sinclair’s team searches
Kane’s seemingly abandoned lab evokes ALIENS so intentionally that they use some of
the same dialogue. Armored Personnel
Carriers (APCs)—check, yellow rotating emergency lights—check, close quarter
gun battles against silent, relentless foes—check. The only thing missing was a power loader,
and that is just because it suddenly changed gears back to ESCAPE FROM NEW
YORK. 
Major Sinclair is more GHOST IN THE SHELL’s Major Motoko than
Snake Plissken (although she does occasionally wears an eye patch when she’s
using her robot eye to look around corners).
Rhona Mitra—who, it turns out, is not Cate Beckinsale—plays
her with an icy proficiency. She never
loses her cool even when she is surrounded by people who want to kill and/or
eat her. The closest she comes is her
irritation at the guard who keeps whacking her with his spear while she’s
trying to talk, up until the moment she kills him with one blow. Do not interrupt this woman.
She is such a badass that her boss gives her 46 hours to
complete her mission. If they had given
her the full two days, she would have just spent the last two hours waiting at
the extraction site, smoking. They had
to make it challenging for her.
Sol (Craig Conway), the chairperson of the Glasgow Cannibal
League (not sure if that is the official title), is a kick. He lacks Issac Hayes’ A1 King of New York
coolness, but he makes up for it in batshit showmanship. His court is like a
post-apocalyptic Cirque du Soleil, with brawling punks spinning on ropes, fire jugglers, and bikers
doing stunts in the center ring. Sol comes strutting out
on stage with his fur lined leather coat and receding Mohawk, The Fine Young
Cannibals blaring from the speakers. He
gets the crowd amped up about the impending execution/barbecue of one of his
captives by throwing paper plates to the crowd.
It’s more of a symbolic gesture; these guys are more into grabbing
handfuls of cooked meat than having a proper picnic.
In fact, I think the whole cannibal angle is mostly for
show. There don’t seem to be enough non-cannibal affiliated people around for these guys to sustain a full man eating lifestyle. Plus, it is shown that there
are huge herds of wild cows just outside of Glasgow, so they are clearly not
desperate for food. Cannibalism is
merely a status thing in Scotland. Every
once in a while they make a big show out of eating a dude. They are kind of like lapsed Catholics only going
to Mass at Christmas.
Malcolm McDowell’s role is not nearly as meaty (cannibal
pun!). Kane is the standard brilliant
scientist driven mad by isolation and paranoia, holding power through ruthless
dogma. He makes grandiose but senseless
statements like, “In the land of the infected, the immune man is king.” Since all the hundreds of survivors in
Scotland are immune, doesn’t that make everyone a king? Clearly people just go along with him
because Malcolm McDowell makes everything sound dramatic and important.
You could also get whiplash from the fight scenes, which
unquestionably are the worst thing about the movie.
They are cut so quick and shaky, I had no idea what was going on most of
the time. Sinclair’s fight with Sol’s
girlfriend, Tattoo Face (Lee-Anne Liebenberg, officially named Viper, but I’m
sure you will agree Tattoo Face is more appropriate), is an absolute
nightmare. It plays out like an
epileptic seizure until the moment Tattoo Face gets decapitated. At least Marshall gave us a moment to
appreciate that gag.
The Black Knight fight at least provided a few wide shots
that last more than a half second. This
was especially important since the opponents are so unevenly matched (he has a
full suit of armor, she has a tank top).
It does establish that she has the advantage of speed and she targets
the knight’s weak spots, making her victory at least somewhat plausible, but
the whole thing could have been done so much better. Given that Marshall (and his DP, Sam McCurdy)
went on to do some absolutely eye popping fight sequences for Game of Thrones,
this seems especially embarrassing. The problem is more with the editing, my opinion. This is a great looking movie and many of the shots are beautifully composed. It's a pity you barely get the chance to see them.
Then there are the ROAD WARRIOR sequences, which have their
own issues. It is a nice juxtaposition
to see a bunch of crazy, spiked up wasteland vehicles chasing after a brand new,
shiny Bentley, but if you are competing with George Miller at his own game, you
are going to lose. The bad guy’s cars
look more conspicuously designed than efficiently and realistically pieced
together, and there just isn’t enough creative stunt work. There are a few nice moments, like when the
Bentley drives straight through Sol’s Murderbus. It’s an impressive endorsement for Bentley, because
the car makes it through without a scratch.
Forget muscle cars and tanks, this is the baby you want to be tooling
around in after the fall of civilization.
It’s also a cute touch that Sol has his dead girlfriend
propped up beside him in his car, and she keeps getting more and more
accidental abuse. It turns out to be a
very misguided gesture of affection.
In the end [Spoiler], Sinclair gives Nelson the recording she
made of Canaris’ boasting about letting all the poor people in London die out
before offering the cure to the virus.
The implication being that Nelson will release it to cause a huge public
outcry against Canaris. Because we all
know that releasing a recording of damaging statements and showing a cavalier
attitude toward abuse of power will end a politician's career instantly. Unless Canaris explains it was just “locker room
talk”.
In keeping with the theme, though, it is a totally rip off
of the end of FURY ROAD. Wait a minute…
C Chaka
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